I got one of the worst and most painful calls i have ever gotten until now. 7 years ago today i found out my grandmother had passed away. Cancer had won the battle was they would all say. One of the greatest and most important people left my life that day. I couldn’t even help her in any way to ease the pain, i was just too far. She was just great to to me and to know i would never get to see her kills me. I wish for just 5 more minutes at least, to properly say goodbye, i never got to say goodbye. Everyday i miss her more and more because i know as the days pass she seems to become so fade in my mind. She was the glue to this crazy family, without we are no longer the same and when i think of that i know she would be so upset, it makes me more upset. I hope she feels proud of me and everything i have done, because if its the last thing i do is to make her proud of me and who i have become. Whenever i place a foot on the stage i think of her and i dedicate that dance to her, its my biggest and almost only connection to her. i miss her so much…i just want her back but i know that’s not possible. Te amo abuela y te extraño. 

3/28/05